5 Reasons The Pope is Communist

I would not consider myself to be the biggest Catholic (in the sense that I'm not a catholic at all), but much like we all become when the Olympics roll around and curling lights up our televisions, every four years we all become experts.

To that point, I think this new pope is a communist.  I've been reading up on Jorge and honestly he freaks me out a little.

1)  He named himself Pope Francis after Francis of Assisi.  That guy was not even part of the church as a priest, he was just really poor and prayed a lot so they priested him (not sure if that is the term, again I haven't been a Catholic expert since 2005).  Jorge was recently quoted as saying ""Oh how I would like a poor church and a church for the poor".

2) He is from South America. I'm American and I am pretty sure that everybody south of us is now communist (except for Chile because they have great skiing).

3) He's a Jesuit (no not the West Virginia punk band from '95).  Jesuits are Catholics but believe in education and science, that sounds pretty communist.

4) Communists love titles, his full official title is:

His Holiness Pope Francis, Bishop of Rome, Vicar of Christ, Successor of the Prince of the Apostles, Supreme Pontiff of the Universal Church,Primate of Italy, Archbishop and Metropolitan of the Roman province, Sovereign of the State of the Vatican City, Servant of the Servants of God.

5) He sold his his huge mansion when he took over in Buenos Aires and moved into an apartment using the money to help the poor.  He rode the bus in to work from said apartment.  Even after the white smoke puffed he rode the bus with the riff raff cardinals back to where they were staying instead of taking the pope mobile out for a test drive.

Here's where the Archbishop of Canterbury used to live until it became the new religion, a country club

So there you have it, but in all honesty, I'm not sure how you could be a good pope and not be communist.

Most of the book of Acts in the Bible sounds awfully communist to me.  Sell what you have to help those with less, eat all your meals together, don't exalt the rich inside of the church.  This Pope Francis sounds like the real deal, and I'm ashamed to say it but the Catholic church looks like it might be practicing what it preaches, maybe it's time to reform the evangelicals here north of the communists.